


Beyond The Horizon

by SaeUmmShhh



Category: Free!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Asperger Syndrome, Childhood Friends, Coming of Age, Emotional Constipation, Existential Crisis, Friends to Lovers, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mutual Pining, References to Depression
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-14
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-03-04 07:47:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,387
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24720019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SaeUmmShhh/pseuds/SaeUmmShhh
Summary: Makoto's never dated anyone before, so why does it feel like his heart is ripping apart as he tries to put his lifelong friendship with his best friend where it belongs, in the past?Or, alternatively,Makoto tries to carve out a life seperate and independent of Haru and unwittingly ends their friendship, only to find him living in the same city two years later.
Relationships: Nanase Haruka & Tachibana Makoto, Nanase Haruka/Tachibana Makoto
Comments: 8
Kudos: 32





	1. Simmering Tide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Existential shower thoughts ft. Makoto, anyone?

There was something about the way he moved. Maybe it was the curve of the water that ebbed and flowed to his bidding. Or the way you couldn't tell where his lithe body ended and where the water began. Haru didn't look like he belonged, he just did.

And Makoto was always envious of that.

He watched his best friend for a few short beats before quietly turning back towards the showers, leaving a small, puddled trail behind. Without needing to turn back, he could already imagine Haru's confused blue eyes following him, probably wondering why he didn't just call out to Haru, to pull him out of the pool as usual.

Or maybe Haru hadn't even noticed him leaving at all. That was just as well.

Entering the cubicle, he carefully draped his towel on top of the door as he closed it. He didn't know why they made these wooden doors so short, all it took was for someone creepy to stand right next to it and they could practically see everything. Even a flimsy shower curtain would have been better. And Makoto wasn't exactly confident in showing off his body, privacy was more up his alley.

Which was why he usually chose to ride home on his bike to wash up. Instead, Makoto found himself turning on the old, squeaking shower head, and he hissed a little as the hot water rushed out and enveloped his skin.

It hurt, but not as much as the heavy task that lay before him.

He wasn't sure if he could do it, but it was better to do it now, right? Makoto wasn't stupid; of course Haru wouldn't like it at first, after all, they've been together for as long as they could remember. There was no memory that either of them had that didn't involve the other person in some way. He tried to take some small comfort in that. It meant that he mattered somewhat to Haru, right?

But Haru, he's always had a bright future lying in front of him. Countless sponsors, college offers and scholarships piling up at his front door, even from their middle school days. Sure, he didn't care about any of them now, but if Makoto knew him at all, he'd probably take one of them up eventually. Haru **had** to swim. It was all he'd ever wanted to do. And by all means, he had Makoto's, and by extension, everyone else's support. Makoto was happy for him, he really was.

So why was it so hard for him to imagine Haru feeling the same way for him? The guilt swam uneasily in his gut. This wasn't how best friends thought about each other, right?

 _You've never thought of him as_ **_just_ ** _a best friend anyway,_ his mind reminded him.

And that was the whole problem, wasn't it? Makoto grabbed the cheap shampoo in frustration, pouring it on his hand before aggressively working it into his scalp, wondering if he could rinse out his intrusive thoughts with it. Nevermind all that, he wasn't even sure if _he_ himself knew what he wanted.

All he knew was that he couldn't stay by Haru's side forever. It wasn't even that he was worried Haru would mind (He wouldn't), but they've been together for so long, Makoto couldn't tell if the things he liked, the food, the places, the friends, the memories he had...did he really like them at all, or did he just like them because he simply liked seeing Haru enjoying those things, and being around those people?

And frankly, it had always rubbed Makoto the wrong way when people told him that Haru was relying on him, when really, it was the opposite. See, he knew almost everything there was to know about Haru, but Makoto could barely even begin to understand himself as an individual. All he ever thought about, all he's ever wanted to think about these past 17 years, was Nanase effin' Haruka.

And Makoto knew, he just knew Haru would never understand that. With or without Makoto in his life, he would still love water, and swimming free. Of course, Makoto loved swimming too, but the fact that he never would have without Haru bothered him deeply. And even then, he was never attached to anything the way Haru or his other friends were to their own passions. Not even swimming was doing it for him.

So alright, Haru wasn't going to be around forever. He knew that. He's accepted it from the start. Somehow, some way or another, Haru would keep diving forward into the future. And if that was inevitable, if that was what lied in store for them both, then-

"Makoto. Water, turn it off."

A pale hand appeared behind him, firmly switching off the water handle. The screeching pressure pelting down on his shoulders and head suddenly dissipated, jerking Makoto out from his thoughts. He heard a soft, disapproving tut behind him.

Makoto turned around, dazed. "Huh, wait why...why are you in here-"

Haru was standing behind him, blank eyes locked up respectfully on the ceiling, huffing as he walked out of the cubicle. He patiently waited for the door to swing behind him before he carefully turned back around and looked properly at Makoto.

"I was calling your name for a while there, you were freezing and you didn't respond, so."

His best friend shrugged, as if it was perfectly normal to just walk in on another dude while showering. Well in their case, seeing as how they were childhood friends, maybe it was, but Makoto's never actually seen Haru completely naked (Which come to think of it, was a pretty amazing feat since Haru constantly strips within 10 feet of any body of water) and he suspected it was the same for the latter.

Probably for the best.

"Ah..." Makoto winced, giving what he hoped was an embarrassed smile, and reached for his towel, wrapping it around his waist. He absentmindedly touched his own shoulder. It was icy cold to the touch. He shivered.

"Sorry, must have lost my train of thought there haha-"

"Makoto." Haru's voice didn't seem to buy into his fake cheer.

"You've been distracted all week." Haru didn't continue, but his still, blue eyes were saying: 

_Out with it. Now._

"I'm just tired, that's all." Makoto took his bag out of the locker and slung it around his chest, keeping his eyes conveniently away from meeting Haru's.

"And?"

"And, it's really nothing. Don't worry about it, Haru."

He gave another smile, calm and serene.

 _Don't ask. Not now._ Makoto secretly hoped Haru would decipher what he really meant. A smaller part of him hoped Haru would keep pressing on anyway, to relieve him of the burden of having to choose when to approach the topic.

He waited for Haru to say something else, but as usual, the dark-haired boy just nodded and gathered up his own things.

"I'm going to shower now, you should head back home."

"It's okay, I'll wait," Makoto turned away and headed for the door. "By the benches, you know where."

He imagined he heard an "Mn," behind him, but Makoto didn't stop to listen. Whatever discussion they needed to have, it didn't have to be now. He could wait. His hand shook as he gripped on the handle of his bag.

Just one more peaceful walk home, he deserved that at least.

Didn't he?

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is a whole lot darker than it needs to be, but I've always found Makoto's mind to be a lot more complex that what it seems, and it's fun to explore that. So yeah.
> 
> And although, yes this is technically a romance story, it's probably gonna be more focused on Makoto and Haru figuring out who they are as people and dealing with their own personal issues first, so...pretty on brand with the canon story, actually?
> 
> Huh.
> 
> Anyways, leave a kudos and a comment if you like what you read, and come yell at me anytime!!


	2. Echoes and French Toast

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A week passes before Makoto finally returns the favour of helpfully barging in while Haru takes a shower, busta-rhymes style.
> 
> More like bust-a-door, aha!
> 
> Can you tell I'm having too much fun writing lame, out of context chapter summaries?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I initially intended for this chapter to have more content, but as I kept writing, it jus kept getting longer and longer, so for consistency's sake, I've split the chapter's events into two parts, so please do look forward to it in the next chapter!!
> 
> Otherwise this really could have turned into a 4000+ words chapter, but I don't have the brain juice to keep up that level of consistent writing for the rest of the fic whoops!
> 
> Anyways, please have fun reading, and leave a kudos and a nice comment if you liked what you read, thank you!

It was a lovely Friday morning; the birds were chirping, the sun was just beginning to rise above the ocean’s horizon outside and Tachibana Makoto, being your very average, run-of-the-mill third year highschooler, was of course, doing what every other third year student did at 7 a.m. in the morning:

Contemplating for the 42071384th time this year whether breaking down someone else’s bathroom door to wake said someone up from potentially drowning in their own bathwater was worth the risk of having to replace the damn thing afterwards.

Decisions, decisions.

"Oi Haru,” Makoto rapped on his best friend's bathroom's sliding door with a little more urgency than the flimsy old thing could handle, “...You do know you kinda left the stove on downstairs, right?"

Ever since that awkward non-conversation they had in the club showers last week, Haru had been acting a little strange during the last few practices. Then again, everyone else was on edge too for the upcoming nationals so that much was understandable. Still, to make breakfast and _then_ take a shower right in the middle of it? What was Haru thinking, usually he wasn't this careless—

Makoto knocked a little harder. "You there?" 

Silence.

The only sound that he could hear from inside, well, besides the door rattling, was the eerie drip-drip-drip coming from the bath's tap besides the sink.

Something didn't feel right.

"Haru? I'm coming in, alright?" Makoto preemptively announced as he tentatively slid the door open, wincing as he heard the old lock snap. Again. He’ll have to fix that later. His eyes traveled as usual to where he expected Haru to be, but...

The bathtub was empty.

Instead of the usual sight of Haru hanging out in his lukewarm bath, he was instead greeted with a chilling view of Haru's hunched back facing him, still fully dressed in his navy blue pajamas, dripping wet from head to toe as he stood blankly in front of his bathroom mirror.

Haru slowly turned at the sound blearily, his body on auto-pilot, towards Makoto. Black hair clung loose across his forehead and nape, the wet strands collecting dewdrops at the ends, that fell and left streaks along his unreadable face. They could almost be mistaken for actual tears, but his eyes remained dry and dull.

A small crack appeared somewhere deep in Makoto's heart to see the eyes of someone he cherished so much now so lifeless and puffy, as if he'd been crying for the whole night.

Had he? Makoto instinctively dug in his toes into the wooden floor to stop himself from rushing over to embrace Haru. _One shouldn't jump into conclusions so quickly,_ he reminded himself. There might be a different, more reasonable explanation for this odd behavior. _Also,note to self: Haru doesn't like spontaneous hugs_. So instead, he quickly scanned his childhood friend for more telling clues.

The palms and fingers of his hands were reddish pink, as if they had been gripping the sink tightly for an extended period of time. Haru should have been shivering, being all soaked like that for who knows how long, but he nevertheless stood so still, nary a shiver seemed to escape him.

Makoto didn't know what to make of the uncanny scene before him. His mouth began to open, a question already forming on his lips but then Haru suddenly seemed to wake up, and shook his head almost immediately.

"Makoto, I..."

Makoto sighed inwardly. Sometimes, he wished he couldn't read Haru as well as he could. Nagisa's dense bluntness would have been useful right about now to push Haru to blurt out whatever the heck was going on, but alas, he was not so gifted in the department of confrontation. Also, it was 7 a.m. in the morning. Too early for loaded questions.

So, instead he nodded and offered, "Shhh, it’s okay. Towel?"

Haru gratefully reached out to accept it, but oddly remained where he stood, a small wet puddle forming around his feet. Makoto raised an eyebrow as the two of them blinked awkwardly at one another. Did he, maybe, actually...want to talk after all?

"I...I still have to shower, Makoto," Haru finally muttered, his ears were beginning to tint red, as he fiddled with the towel in his hands.

_Oh._

"Oh-? Oh, yeah! Of course, I'll uh, check on the grilled mackerel, see you downstairs in a bit, yeah?" An unwarranted warmth creeped into Makoto's face as he spun on his heels and nearly slammed the bathroom door closed off its hinges.

A muffled, "Ah. Mn, okay," came from inside the door.

Makoto just about managed to make it until midway past the stairs before he finally sat down and screamed silently into his hands.

_What was that?_

_What the hell was going on?_

_Why was Haru dazed and drenched in his pajamas and why did Haru and I just stare at each other for no reason – wait, Haru didn't actually think I wanted to stay and watch him shower, right? Oh god, oh dear heavens—_

Makoto buried his face into his palms.

Just then, a slight burning smell wafted through, breaking him out of his muddled thoughts.

Oops.

He got up, hurried to the kitchen and stared, appalled at the smoking abomination in front of him. Makoto sighed in resignation, gave a silent apology to the ocean gods for wasting perfectly good canned fish, and promptly dumped it in the trash can.

_Now then, does Haru have any eggs left?_

Makoto wondered if he could conjure up some french toast, his last attempt wasn't too bad eh? At least, Haru didn't seem to mind it as much as his younger siblings did. Then again, nothing was ever sweet enough for his little Ran and Ren.

The eggs were easy enough to spot (top row, inside the left fridge door) and he managed to crack three into a random bowl, and carefully scooped up most of the stray eggshell pieces. No sugar to be found, however, so he dumped a teaspoon of mirin and salt before mixing it haphazardly with a soup spoon (wait, was it supposed to be mixed?) and dipped the slices of bread unceremoniously into the liquid egg mixture, and plopped it proudly onto the pan.

It didn't sizzle.

Makoto frowned, tilting his puzzled head as he stared at it. Pretty sure his mom said it was supposed to sizzle immediately after it hit the pan. Weird, perhaps the pan wasn't hot enough yet.

He waited a little more.

It remained in the same state as before after five minutes however, except sadder, seemingly staring at him in disappointment through its soggy eyes. Had the gas run out? Makoto bent down and looked at the stove handle and—

He hadn't even turned it on.

"You might wanna hurry up, I'm dying here," Haru's amused voice popped up right behind him.

Makoto jumped up immediately, red-faced from ear to ear. "Haruuuuu-!!!" He pouted, placing a hand on his chest to sooth his racing heartbeat, "That's not fair, you know I scare easily!"

"Why do you think I did it?" A tiny, but playful smirk danced on the tip of Haru's lips, as he switched on the stove, and continued to towel his damp hair with his free hand. Speaking of which—

"Haru-chan?"

"Tsk, don't call me that. What is it?"

"Why are you in your home clothes?"

Haru casually flipped the toast, shrugging. "My trunks are still on too," a small hint of pride peeked through in his voice, as if that made any sense.

Makoto gave him a withering look. "Haru..."

" _Makoto..._ " Haru parroted half-mockingly.

"Tsk, fine. Fine. I'm not going to school today, I'm sick," Haru plated the last french toast and turned his head away, coughing into his fist halfheartedly.

"Haru-chan, even Rei wouldn't fall for that, y'know?" Makoto took the plate gently from him, and held Haru carefully by the shoulder, turning him around so that they finally faced each other.

Haru still refused to meet his eyes, but he finally muttered out, "I...I just can't today. There's something I need to do in town later in a few hours."

"In town?"

"Yeah, just some personal stuff, I wouldn't be able to make it if I went to school, so."

"And your parents? They're okay with this, you skipping school?”

Haru gave a short nod, but Makoto wasn’t fully satisfied with that answer. Ever since Haru’s father moved across the country for work way back in middle school, both of the Nanases barely came around Iwatobi anymore, which probably gave the others the false impression that his parents were pretty chill and easy-going. But Makoto knew better. He still remembered his mom talking to his dad about it in passing after Nagisa’s runaway incident:

“...Frankly speaking, dear...lucky for us it wasn’t our Haruka. Not that I dare be the judge on how another raises their child, but we all know if it wasn’t for the fact that the poor boy was deemed a swimming prodigy so early on, his father would probably be on par with Nagisa’s parents, if not much worse.”

 _The main difference being that if Haru was the one that ran away, his father probably wouldn’t bother to find him,_ Makoto remembered thinking dryly.

Makoto had kept his thoughts to himself at the dinner table then, knowing it was out of turn for him to comment on such adult matters but he couldn’t help secretly agreeing with his mom. The lucky ones ought to be Haru’s parents, for having such a gifted child that did decently well no matter what subject or sport he tried his hand at, and having such a gentle and good personality. They didn’t deserve him.

Perhaps he was being too harsh, but someone who only ever called once a month to ask solely on his son’s academic achievements and merits before hanging up immediately didn’t exactly scream ‘Parent of the Year’ to him, but Makoto knew not to voice this sentiment out to Haru. Family matters were the one taboo subject he and Haru steered clear of. Or rather, there wasn’t really much to say. Can’t exactly talk about a family that was barely there, right?

“Well then, I’ll come with you.”

“NO!” Makoto blinked, taken aback by Haru’s sharp tone.

“...”

Haru seemed just as shocked with his own raised voice.

“No, I meant, no, as in...You’re the club captain. You still have to be there for practice. Plus,” Haru added, “I’m not technically skipping, since my mom’s calling the school later about it.”

_Oh. Now that’s news. Haru’s mom knew about this too?_

Makoto thought about this, but still felt uneasy. “You sure?”

Haru shook him off and stuffed a folded french toast in his best friend’s mouth, effectively shutting him up. “Yes, yes, I’m sure, you worrywart. Now hurry up and leave or _you’ll_ be the one who ends up with a strike on your perfect attendance record, Mr Class President.”

Makoto complained loudly, “Mmhhm!! Mnh mhnn, hm hnm hrmm mmhrrm?”

“Yeah yeah, I’m still coming to the festival later.”

“Hm. Bwe therm mat smix, mmphrommish?”

“Oi. Don’t talk with your mouth full, also you’re picking me up later so what’s the point of you telling me the time?” Haru handed Makoto his bag and walked him towards the front door.

Makoto gulped down the last of his toast and looked back at Haru.

“I’ll go now but call me if you need anything okay?”

“Yes, _Mamakoto._ Now, go,” Haru teased him with his favourite nickname while he leaned lazily against the door frame, shooing him as he yawned.

Usually, Makoto had blushed or cried in the past when other kids referred to him in such a mocking tone, but somehow when Haru did it, it felt so endearing that he didn’t mind it as much. Besides, what was there to be ashamed about being perceived as feminine anyway?

Nothing, that’s what.

So before he left, Makoto leaned in till he was almost eye-to-eye with Haru, ruffled his soft, dark bangs and smiled sweetly as he replied, “ Alright, _Haru-chan_. Mamakoto’s gonna go now, be good while I’m gone, yeah?”

All he earned for that cheeky gesture was Haru’s wide eyes, mouth agape in stunned silence, then a huffed pout before he was shoved unceremoniously out onto the front porch, the door slamming heavily behind him.

“Don’t. Call me that,” came the quiet retort from behind the door.

Makoto laughed to himself.

The sun had risen above his head, the birds were still singing overhead and the warmth in his heart made him want to skip like a giggly school girl in love. It was a lovely Friday morning and today was shaping up to be a good day, after all.

He couldn’t wait to see Haru at the night festival later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Um, foreshadowing??? Who is she?????
> 
> Also, i'm so, so sorry for what's about to happen in the next chapter, really,,,my deepest condolences.
> 
> So yeah, have a lil bit of domestic Makoharu before you go, it's gonna be a while before you see that again ohoho!! I hope I got across how natural it is for them to communicate non-verbally and how much they tend to guess what the other is thinking to make up for when they don't get a response back. Also, yes I made them blush like 3 times this chapter and guess what?? That's gonna keep happening (in the far, far future) cuz these dumbasses bashful aight???
> 
> Leave them be!
> 
> So yeah, leave a kudos and scream at me about how much you love Makoharu in the comments if you liked this chapter, and what your guesses are for what goes down in the next chapter!!
> 
> I really enjoy reading and replying to all of them, they're really motivating to see and it makes me really happy and soft!
> 
> Thanks again for reading!


End file.
